Boys are Girls and Girls are Boys: What's happening?

You may have noticed that there are a lot of people who don't identify with either of the two main sex genders, male or female.  (I am not trying to dispute that Lesbians, Gays, and Transgenders are not a gender class onto their own.)  What I am suggesting is that there are an increasing number of people who want their gender identity to be X, or them, or something like that. 

I was a bit confused when I first heard this, and just blamed it on Millenials being like Baby Boomers were when we all had to have Beatle haircuts.

But recently, I started noticing that there were a great many people, (non of whom I actually know), who seem to have characteristics that make them neither male or female.  I am making this statement based on their  overall look without reference to their sexual parts.  I have seen a lot of guys for instance who actually look like they could be girls.  In fact, they could be girls, but they look like they could also be guys!  My friends are noticing the same thing. 

The other day, I was at a reception hall, and I saw an employee behind the desk, and I could not figure out which gender they belonged to.  If took a few days and listening to them talk that I determined that they might be female. 

If you want to give me an argument that it should not matter what gender they are, that only their abilities should matter, let's not go there. This article is not about that.  It is about the blurring of male female differences. 

The question is:  Why is this happening? 

Is it a fashion statement?  Is it because there is too much plastic and hormones in the water?  Is it that my eyes are failing me in my old age?  Is the human genome changing? 

When I look at ants, and bees, I see highly specialized societies where sex is limited to a few members of the society:  the queen and a few males. 

Sometimes, I wonder if autistic people are the forerunner of specialized forms of humans of the future.  Highly functioning autistic people would easily fit this category.  But their autism might preclude them from having sexual relations, or reproducing.  (I do know one woman who is a high functioning autistic person, but her relationship with her husband is not what you would call warm, and almost a relationship of convenience for both of them.)

Perhaps these X, or thems, are also a forerunner of the future?  Non sexual beings ready to work as drones. 

Or perhaps it is just that we have so much medical waste seeping into the water table that we are now affecting how we as humans are developing. 

Not sure what is really happening here, but I thought I would put it out there just to see what anyone else has to say. 

Discover Mother Nature's Cheap Viagra

As a middle aged male, I noted that my sexual performance was not always where I thought it should be.  I wondered if I should try Viagra and those other pecker helpers. 

So I went to my doctor and got a few samples. Here is what I discovered.  

Viagra, Levitra and Cialis all work as promised and will give you a good workable erection.  With Viagra and Levitra, you have to time it right because these drugs work within a specific period, such as two hours for instance.  That is when they can have the greatest effect.  Your pecker will be swelling and ready for action.    Furthermore, take these drugs at least one hour after you have eaten, and maybe 2 hours, to clear your stomach and intestines so that the blood you need for your erection is not needed by the stomach to digest the food.  These drugs will take an hour on their own just to kick in, so you can see that you should be working on a fairly empty food tank to be effective!

These vaso-dilators relax your blood vessels to allow more blood flow.  They need to have blood to help you to swell up.  The closest blood supply is in the abdomen, because you don’t want it coming from your brain and its pleasure zones at a time like this! 

It worked well if I did not eat a heavy meal before sex.  At least that is how it worked for me.  Viagra and Levitra supposedly stay in your system for 24 hours before they are considered used up.  That means that if you use one on Thursday afternoon, you might be able to get some effect from it for a Friday morning tryst.   No guarantees, but it might work for you.  It worked for me.

Cialis, what the French call Le Weekender, is a drug you can take which should be effective for 36 hours, or all day Friday and most of Saturday too. There might also be some residual effect so you might get a little bit more out of it. 

A couple of things about these drugs:

You need a prescription for these drugs.  They are not cheap by comparison, costing as much as $ 20 a pill in some cases.   You can get some knockoffs from far-away places, but you really do not know what went into making them, so it is buyer beware. 

If you do not have the desire, they will not do anything for you.  You should be horny first, and these will help you achieve your goal, which should be to have a successful intercourse.  If you are not horny, then get your testosterone levels checked.  That may be the real problem.  Me, I am always horny.  Mostly in my mind,  but horny nonetheless. 

Another thing about these drugs is that they have side effects.  Two of my buddies took Viagra in the morning on separate occasions and tried to play squash in the afternoon and found they could not do it.  Their hearts kept racing at high speeds and they were getting dizzy.  One actually passed out and had to be revived. 

So, sex with Viagra is the only physical activity you should do for the day, once you have taken the pill.  I am not sure if this is the case with the other two drugs.  I did not want to take the chance to find out. 

There are other ill effects.  Levitra gives me heartburn.  Not usually right away, but perhaps after a meal, or maybe all the next day.  Viagra gives me a stuffy nose, a really bad stuffy nose!  Plus, both of these drugs might make your face red even long after you have had sex.  You see, the blood flows better everywhere.  I remember being away one weekend and attending a seminar and one of the guys and his girlfriend arrived late for the meeting, coming fresh from their hotel room.  The girlfriend had a big smile on her face, and the guy, who sported a good beard, had a face redder than Santa Claus’ jacket.  They had no excuse to be late, so we all knew what they had been doing.  Good for them!

At one point after I had taken Cialis, my ears started burning.   What a headache it was to put up with all these things! All I wanted to do was just have a nice copulation.  So, I started wondering about them. 

There are alternatives to these prescription drugs and they might be just as effective, and less expensive. 

If you go to the health food store, they keep a wide variety of these things behind the counter.  They are not pharmaceuticals, but usually herb based remedies.  The government health service examines them and approves them. 

Max Vigor is one that I have used and like, and at $5 a pill it is a good price. You can buy it in bulk and really get the cost down by 20%.   Not sure how it works, but I do not seem to get any side effects. There are other products as well, but what I did was ask the counter staff, (a guy) which pecker helper, (or words to that effect), sold the most.  Max Vigor was the one that sold most at his store, so that told me it worked.  I kinda prefer those pills you take as you need them, rather than a pill wherein you take it every day for a month.  Those can be expensive.  The other thing is that I prefer not to take a pill at all!  I just want to be able to do the job whenever the opportunity, and my erection arises!  Check with your local health store in your area to see what works best in your area. 

But I decided I had to do something to get the blood flowing more naturally. 

I asked a buddy of mine if he had problems with erections.  His answer was, “Not if I don’t abuse myself for a few days, don’t get bombed out of my mind, and get a good night of sleep.”. He was a fellow who never married and had a string of girlfriends who didn’t stick around.  (Not sure why, but perhaps he might not have wanted to commit to anyone). 

He was five years younger than me. 

Another fellow I know who was 70 when I spoke with him, and who was in good physical condition told me that he was sexually active, but of course, not like a teenager.  I asked him if he needed to use any pecker helpers.  He said he did not take any drugs at all period!  But he did make sure he kept his weight under control, and ate lots of fruits and vegetables every day.  He was a lean fellow, and he exercised regularly. 

Now you do have to remember that the raging hard-on of your teenage years will be a distant memory when you are in your fifties.(or seventies as my buddy was.)  But really, all you want to be able to do is penetrate the vagina of your choice easily rather than having to stuff it in like an empty sock.  So with that in mind, I wanted to see what I could do to make my performance more consistent.

I stumbled across the doc-giff.com website a few years into my search for some solutions.  His real name is Ken Walker and he wrote a medical column for a series of newspapers.  His website was quite useful because he was able to point out a few things.  

Beets

Dr. Ken Walker wrote the following article in his website about beets. Read it.  I copied it in its entirety.

“February 15th, 2014 Beetrootburgers, To Lower Blood Pressure and Boost Amour   

Why would I want to eat beets? Because my Mother happened to like beets and said they were good for me. You did not say “No” to my Mother. Besides, I thought they might be better than spinach. Now it appears my Mother made an excellent choice as research shows the lowly beet packs a powerful punch.

Beets are a traditional vegetable in Eastern and Central Europe and India. Fortunately, beets are easily grown most of the year, have long storability and adapt to a wide variety of climates.

The medicinal value of beets dates back to early times. Hippocrates, the Father of Medicine, recommended beets for binding wounds, blood cleansing and digestive problems. The goddess of love, Aphrodite, believed her romantic power was due to beetroot, possibly the reason that beetroot is pictured on the brothel walls of ancient Rome. But there’s more to beets than helping Romans revel in sex.

Dr. Amrita Ahluwalia, Professor of Vascular Pharmacology at England’s London School of Medicine, is author of a unique study. He reports in the U.S. Journal Hypertension that those who drank beetroot juice showed a decrease in blood pressure within 24 hours. Equally interesting, a previous study reported that people who drank a pint of beetroot juice showed a decrease in blood pressure even when their blood pressure was normal!

So what’s the secret ingredient in beets that lowers blood pressure? For years we’ve known that nitrate decreases hypertension. Ahluwalia says that beets are high in inorganic nitrate which, when eaten, is changed into the gas, nitric oxide (NO). Nitric oxide causes blood vessels to relax resulting in lowered blood pressure.

Another study, reported in the Journal of Applied Psychology, involved men aged 19 to 38 who drank a big glass of beetroot daily for six days before exercise tests such as bicycling. Researchers at the University of Exeter in England proved that drinking beetroot juice boosts stamina and helps people exercise up to 16 percent longer. In fact the study suggests that the effect is greater than that achieved by regular exercising.

Professor Andy Jones, an advisor to England’s top athletes, says, “We were amazed by the effects of beetroot juice on oxygen uptake because these effects cannot be achieved by any other known means, including training”.

Now, here is an entrepreneur’s dream for giving MacDonald’s competition and maybe making zillions of dollars, Beetrootburgers. Professsor Garry Duthie, at the Rowett Research Institute of Nutrition and Health, says that processed, convenient high fat foods increase every year in Scotland. This “bad fat”, he adds, undergoes oxidation in the stomach where it is transformed into potentially toxic compounds and absorbed into the body. It is linked to cancer and heart disease.

Duthie’s research shows that a combination of turkey and beetroot, which contains antioxidant compounds, stops the oxidation of bad fats. Besides, he says, this combination tastes good and looks like a normal burger. So far no one has produced a commercial beetrootburger.

But now a small U.S. Company has developed ” Superbeets”, concentrated organic beetroot crystals, that pack a powerful punch. Just one teaspoon of this concentrate mixed with four ounces of water gives you the NO power of three beets for a fraction of the cost. For instance, millions of people suffer from arthritis.  Superbeets provide the NO to improve circulation, decrease nerve irritation and inflammation in joints. More nitric oxide also aids asthma patients as NO calms the immune system and relaxes airways.

Studies show that nitric oxide, by increasing blood flow, helps fight the complications of type 2 diabetes. More blood flow helps relieve the pressure of glaucoma and kidney disease. As well it’s been shown that levels of NO are significantly lower in depressed people. And since erectile dysfunction is due to inadequate circulation, increased amounts of nitric oxide can solve this common problem.

An easy saliva measurement is available with Superbeets to monitor the amount of increased NO being produced. Some people using Superbeets will notice a pink-red urine, an indication that cardiovascular health has improved. ”

###

I did try a concentrate of beet juice from the health food store, but I cannot say that I noticed anything of value.  I may have taken too much one time and broke into a rash. 

I am not interested in increasing my oxygen levels to perform in sports.  The only sports performance improvement I wanted was in bedroom sport.  I started to add beets to my diet and I noticed a difference within a day! I always had morning wood!  Just one beet did the job.  So for me, a little bit of nitrous oxide obtained from the beet was enough to help me out. 

Beets do not taste great, but you can make them more tasty by sautéing them in sesame oil in a sauce pan.  The oil imparts a nutty taste to the beet which makes it more palatable.

Also beets have a bunch of fibre, so they help with elimination of stomach waste which means less weight and more blood for the penis!  It seems to be working for me so perhaps you might want to try it for you. 

If you decide to add beets to your diet, I suggest you try perhaps one fresh medium beet, twice a week.  Beets can cause a bit of discomfort in the bowel if you are not used to them.   Just take it easy and monitor your own personal results.

I was now able with confidence to seek out new sexual partners. I tried all kinds of women, eventually whittling the choices down to about ten with whom I felt I had the most successful liaisons.  By successful liaison, I meant value for money exchanged, a safe place and a developing good relationship.  Some of the girls I saw more regularly than others.  Others I just visited occasionally  but it was as though we were long lost lovers getting back for a reunion. 

I could not be happier.

Falling uncomfortably into love, and how I was able to get out of it.

One night, I was sitting at home listening to music, and perhaps reading, when I realized something was odd.  I was smiling.  In fact, I felt particularly good.  I don't want to say that this was unusual, but I was suspicious as to why I should be feeling so much better than I normally feel.  I had to find out why.

I was listening to a favorite song, and then I realized what the problem was.  I kept thinking about a girl with whom I had been playing badminton. She was a real beauty.  Sexy. Vivacious.  Great figure.  A really good badminton player and available. 

We always had good conversations, and the way she looked at me had me looking back at her in a warm affectionate way.  And these things had basically had a big impact on my brain.  I was dreaming about her but I realized that I didn't want to go there, and couldn't go there.  But I could not get her off my mind.  It was affecting everything I did.

I had to do something about it. 

So I enlisted the help of two close girl friends who played in the badminton group.  I approached each of them, told them about my problem. I could not get this woman out of my head.  They admonished me, knowing that I was married, and they had both met my wife.  I told both of them I knew that already, but what I needed is to find out what happened and what I could do to eliminate the problem. I had been caught totally off guard!  They agreed to help.

So, we went out to lunch, (my treat), and we discussed the situation. 

Both girls knew the other woman. 

We were all in our 50's and 60's.

I wanted to know what had happened to get me into this situation. 

They both came to the conclusion that this woman, who was very socially adept, knew how to use a certain set of skills to seduce a man. 

First of all, she always smiled.  And her smile was radiant.  Even her eyes sparkled.  That was step one. I fell for the smile.

Secondly, when she talked, she always finished her sentences with an upward lilt, which had the effect of inviting a response.  And of course, she was getting it from me.

Thirdly, she not only talked with those beautiful lips, but she also talked through the eyes, looking at me intently.  Yikes.  I was mesmerized and hadn't a clue. 

She topped it all off with a touch to my wrists, my thighs, my hands, my shoulders, and I was hooked. 

The girls explained to me that these techniques would work every time, and I was apparently without defence. 

So we had to build some fortifications.

Twice a week, we all played badminton at a local club.  Afterward we all retired to the lounge to have a drink and dessert and conversation.  This woman always positioned herself across from me so that I would be in the direct line of fire.

Step one of the strategy was to show up for the drink and dessert but that I should position myself on the same side of the elongated table as she.  That way, I could not see her. 

Step two was to have the two helpers sit between me and her every time so I would be far enough away to avoid her touching me. 

Step three was to avoid all other contact with her.  I did not want to leave the group, because I enjoyed the conversation and the fun we all had.   Nor did I want her to know what was going on, that I was trying to distance myself from her. 

Well, we put it in place, and it took me about a month to get her out of my head, but the strategy worked. Eventually, I was feeling a lot more sane, and more comfortable about being in her presence at these events. 

That was a close one.

Ending the affair amicably

I did it today.

Ten years after I started having an affair with a woman, which I tried to break off on at least three prior occasions, I was able to get her to agree today that we had basically run out of steam and it was time for both of us to move on.

We were like Richard Burton and Elizabeth Taylor.  We were madly in love, insanely jealous of each other; we had highs that were fantastic, and lows that were abysmal.  While neither of us were prepared to leave our spouses, (we each had children), we did agree that if something happened to each of our spouses, we would move in together.

She dreamed of having a condo in the sky. I just dreamed of being with her. 

Our previous potential breakups occurred over misunderstandings with each of our relationships with other people.  My lady friend was an incredible flirt which really irritated me.  On one occasion, I was prepared to take every gift she had ever given me, and pack it up in a box and dump them on her front lawn of her house and never talk to her again.

On other occasions, she would tell me about all the guys who used to chase her and the things they said.  She thought we could talk about it.  I couldn't understand how she would always allow herself to get into these situations.  After all, when two guys are sitting on either side of you in the bar after a game of badminton, and both talking about French kissing and wanting to practise the European approach to greetings, which of course is a kiss on the cheeks, you didn't have to be there unless you wanted to be in my opinion. 

She used to get mad at me for playing with a female partner in our badminton league for two years, and winning matches.  She complained that the partner kept undoing the buttons on her blouses lower and lower each time she noticed her playing with me.  I never even noticed it.  I never even considered making a pass at her.

There was quite a disconnect between what I thought she was and some of the things she did.  I told her that she could do what she wanted but she should make sure that I didn't find out about it.  She could not help herself. 

Eventually, I concluded that we could never live together. 

I wanted to stop the relationship.  Whenever I tried to end it, she would wail and cry and beg for me to talk to her.  I always gave in. 

Then I realized, that the only way to end the relationship was to see less and less of her as time went on.  Fortunately, a couple of things happened to help that along.  I needed a shoulder operation to fix a tear in some tendons, and so that meant that I could not play social badminton with her, and she had to undergo some surgery for a suspected tumor.  Prior to the operation, as little as four months ago, we still got together for sex and dinner. It was always hard to say no to that offer, but she did think at one point I was going to cancel, and said that she would have got the message. 

Anyway, today, we met up for coffee and it had been a month since we had last talked.  (I invited her to meet up with me because I had something to give her.)  She had some other issues taking up time in her life, and I told her that because of issues in my life that I would not be available for much of the year, (shoulder operation, moving office at work, etc). 

I gave her a personalized memento of our last ten years together.  I told her that if she didn't feel she could take it then I would keep it.  She accepted it, and said she would always treasure it.  She said she would always love me no matter what.  I said the same to her.  We kissed goodbye. She left. 

That was a real happy ending for me. 

So the question is, would I start up a new affair with another married woman? Well, for now, the answer is no. While I was in love with her, we just could not do all the things we would have loved to do.  (We had travelled together on several trips over the course of the ten years).  The sex was not as  frequent as I would have liked, and that makes me think that anyone who flirts with her and thinks he is going to get lucky will get a disappointment rather than what he wants.  That was just her nature. 

What I will likely do is resort to the use of escorts to satisfy my sexual needs.  That way, I will get what I want, and knowing that they are with other men too will not bother me at all. 

I consider myself to be very lucky in this one.  It was a great relationship, but it was not meant to be.  And we both got out alive. 

The Choice: an affair with a married woman, or an escort.

Here is a good choice. And a difficult one as well.  Both guarantee sex,  but one you will have to pay for, and the other, well, you might have to pay for it too!

Having been in both situations, my preference would be to choose to have sex with the escort over the married woman.

There are a bunch of reasons for this.

For one thing, the escort will usually be available when you want her, whereas the married woman will have to work around her husband and her family.  You can also have a variety of escorts to choose from, and if one isn't available, another might be.   Try doing that with a married woman!  Not gonna work.

Depending on the day, the married woman may or may not be in the mood for sex, whereas the escort will likely be more available.  Of course this is not guaranteed, because she might be with another client, or might even be having a bad day!  After all, she is human too!

There is less romancing with an escort.  There is nothing wrong with romancing an escort.  She will love it and your worth to her will also rise because you will be looking after some of her needs.  For all you know, you are the only guy who does anything like that and that makes you stand out from all the other people.

On the other hand, with the married woman, depending on how the situation developed, you might have to continually romance her just to let her know that you are interested. And she may demand that  Lunches, movies, dinners, gifts, and other little things to make sure that you can get what you want.  And what if the frequency of what you want is not there?  Did I say you will pay the escort?  Don/t think for a moment that you will not be paying the married woman!  It might be more costly than the escort in the long run. Just ask Paul McCartney:  Thirty million for five years of sex.  Elliot Spitzer would have paid less for his escort at $ 5,000 a night over the same period.  And I will bet he had a much better time.

That's another thing:  the escort has the training and experience to do all those quirky little things that the married woman might not feel inclined to do unless of course she has been trained by her husband.

And what if you fall in love with the married woman and move in with her, (after she leaves her ralationship)?  Try and go out alone without her and take note of the questions:  "Where are you going?, Who are you going to be with? When will you be back?"  Remember, this is a woman who got you through a cheating relationship.  She already knows you have weaknesses.   It will be an uncomfortable situation for sure.

So:  interesting choice but the escort would be the better choice in most cases, and the least stressful.